Well Done Fillet

Ask Manuel!

I've got a question. What the fuck is wrong with people? Eh, but seriously, what is wrong with the world? I arrived at work on Monday to find a chap on the other side of the street sparked out. He was just lying there on the ground for all I and the people walking round [...]

Problems? Worries? Heartache? Waiter woes? Ask Manuel!

Not sure which fork to use with which course? Scared of angering the lovely waiter with silly questions about beetroot? Not sure what to do when the pork tastes like a wrestlers jock strap? Like wine? Like coke? Not sure if you can ask for a pint glass of wine mixed with coke? Worried that [...]

Ask Manuel – Substitutions…

Good question today. Not saying the previous queries weren't good but this is a good question. The vexed issue of substituting. Rafa Benitez should read this. Heh, idiot. From reader Plongeur: I have one for you…how do I wangle substitutions without receiving both the wrath of the kitchen and the waiter? I’m not a picky [...]

Ask Manuel – Ass Hat Waiters…

Last week a couple of you asked if it was "okay to get well and truly shit faced whilst out for dinner?". When I say a couple of you I really mean The Cousin and a spam-bot called Amy. But it is a pertinent question to which I would sadly have to answer, no. It's [...]

Ask Manuel – The Black Pepper Ceremony

I didn't do an Ask Manuel post last week, long story....don't ask. Heh. The most common question at the moment is, "How the hell do I get out of here?" or rather, "Ow ze bloddy ell do I gets out of zis god forsaken stooopid leetle place?" Ah the French, lovely people but easily stressed. [...]

Ask Manuel!

Chum Natalie contacted me at Fillet Towers, via the often misunderstood medium of Facebook, with a waiter/guest related question. "I was in a cafe yesterday & the waiter insisted on telling me the specials. I felt bad interrupting him to say, listen I just fancy the burger & chips. (I know, I'm classy) he proceeded [...]